Life of Intent

As you know, my life is about intent, in part. It's also about serving God through serving people and animals. I realize that we're coming up on the 2 year mark of the earthquake, as I think of it, that completely swallowed life as I knew it. Two years ago I realized that I needed to entirely reinvent my life.

It takes great courage to reinvent yourself and your life, but I see others around me doing it too. I personally don't think we have a choice - it's a very straight-forward decision for me. When things aren't working in your life and it takes more than "tweaking" to make it work, you have to make major changes, live in despair, or give up and cash out. To me, making the major changes is the only acceptable choice. Just as my childhood was spent moving from state to state, my life has been a series of reinventions. The first major one came when I was 19. I made a vow to God not to kill myself or even contemplate it. At the time, I believed it was the only sin God didn't forgive. I no longer believe that at all but at the time it helped me move on. At that time I went so far as to legally change my first name. Jennifer was not my given name - it was the name I chose when I chose to live. I wanted to be called Jenny and to make myself into the best Jenny I could be given my core traits. I've done that very successfully. I am now much more than I set out to be at that time, "beyond my wildest dreams." So I'm very proud of myself. And actually, this is the first time I've actually thought of this in those terms, so you're hearing the self-discovery. I just realized that I fully achieved what I set out to achieve, and way more so.

In my childhood and adulthood there were smaller reinvention points along the way. One of the major ones was my transition from serious musician to artist. When I was 13, after more than 6 months of art lessons, I was finally oil painting. A few months later, I had to make a choice between continuing my private clarinet lessons or the art lessons. I chose to continue my clarinet lessons although it broke my heart. I so loved painting, and hadn't been taught enough that I could continue painting on my own. In high school, music was my life and I started college as a music education major but had to drop out. It was such a life changing decision and I've barely touched my clarinet in the years since then. Now it's still my heart but painting is my bliss. I'm telling you this just to make you think about your life, and because it's still so significant to my heart. How incredible that I completely walked away from something so important to me for so long. But people do that with interests and people every single day.

In 1980 I transitioned from single woman to wife. In 1981 I transitioned into a mother. You don't think of these things are reinvention points but in many ways they are. See, you've all reinvented yourself in some way, and with intent. Whether you realized it or not, whether you recognized or consciously applied intent or not. In 1990 I transitioned into a single parent. These were all major transition points but the second big reinvention point is the one I started 2 years ago. I was about to get divorced, put the man I was married to in jail, and needed a whole new way of life and income source. This one also involved God - finally getting in touch with what I'm meant to do in this life. Many of you don't believe in such things but I've known since I was 13 that I've had a mission in life, and the knowledge started forming even before that. I set my intent to discover the mission, and live serving God and by using my gifts and talents. It's been a very wild ride.

It started with talking with a dear friend to gather resource information. A series of events led me to the man who told me I'm a healer and should become attuned to Reiki. I'd never heard of it. He warned me that it would open up new worlds to me, things I thought were science fiction. Oh, he was so right! I really knew nothing about even angels at the time. I'd randomly read a few minds before and mentally transferred a few messages, but had no control over it. Now I do meaningful intuitive angels card readings for people, am a Reiki Master/teacher, have introduced 2 others to Reiki and they've sought attunements, I've spoken with the departed, had a visitation from Archangel Michael... It's amazing. I've emerged as an animal communicator/pet psychic and behaviorist, and perform Reiki on animals and people, in person and Distance. And I do the counseling and life coaching. My whole life is about helping others. I've launched this blog and have had more than 3600 page views in the last 15 months. I started my own company 15 months ago, making and selling products using my own essential oil blends to ease physical problems. I also have a huge network of friends that love me, some of whom have become family. Two years ago, I hadn't met any of them.

Two years ago I was living with and married to the most selfish, self-centered, abusive man I've ever known. My life was all about staying safe by giving him as much of what he wanted as I could, 24/7. I was totally tied to him, home with him all the time, worked a business with him. Except my end of the business was usually mostly picking up after him, doing his constant dishes, cleaning up his messes (business and otherwise), and sex on demand. When you set your intent and follow through with it consistently, you can eventually transform yourself and your life. I'm living proof. I'm still working on transforming my circumstances so I can thrive financially, but I'm now thriving in all other ways, for the first time in my life.