These days I'm absolutely loving my life! Nothing outwardly has changed, as I've stated. I still don't have a job or car, still live in daily pain because I haven't received physical healing. It hurts to walk and type most days, and that's just part of it. But I'm living with an overflowing heart and all the joy that brings. Part of most days it's overflowing and I have to flow it onto others in my life. So I am able to be a stream of blessing to others and that just increases that heart and flow. Because positively touching others has always been one of my greatest goals in life. So every day I'm living in Love, flow, and gratitude. It makes the rest mere details. It totally takes my mind off the pain. I never dwell in the pain or problems any more. And I know I'm on the verge of getting all I truly want and need in my life. I can feel it and see it coming. God has been so very good to me, showing me the flow. At first I learned to rely on Him as He would provide when I was in crisis, moved from crisis to crisis. Now He's ahead of these needs, showing me the rewards of faith. I am zinging and humming with life and high vibration!
I just completed the work for my first college class. I am very proud of myself, and thought about the word "pride." I know that pride can lead to a fall, and big ones. I know that self can be such a problem, can lead to so much grief. It all depends on the context, what we do with it. There's selfish and self centered, and they can be "good" or "bad" depending. It's actually all about balance, heart, and attitude. You can't successfully be too selfless or too self centered or selfish. There needs to be heart and balance. It's necessary to be somewhat self centered and selfish. You have to take care of yourself and your own needs or someone else has to. Those are just laws of nature. You take care of your needs or you get diseased or disabled and it becomes necessary for others to take care of you. But if you take care of yourself in all ways, you can also help take care of others in whatever way given to you. You're given this by way of gifts, talents, experience, and opportunities. We're all supposed to take care of ourselves plus care for others within our capacity and calling.
So back to pride. Again, this has to be in balance, can be "good" or "bad." I am very proud of myself for successfully completing my first college class. I have new stature in my own eyes. But I understand that all I did was my own part in this. The first class was designed to teach us to navigate the system (all online), to ease us into college courses and expectations. The teacher really aided me in my success, as did God. None of this was on my own. So that balances the pride. I did my part and had ample help in succeeding. I am proud to have done my part as well as I did, and very grateful for all the help I got. We all need to have healthy self-esteem, and this pride is part of mine. I really needed this, because my self-esteem took such a hit two years ago. And this leads back to the overflowing heart. I am so very grateful to my teacher, and for the blessings. I so love me at this point, and everyone. And as long as I'm functioning from overflowing heart, it balances all the self and pride issues.
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