"Standing in your truth" is something we hear within the spiritual community. In the rest of the world it's expressed as staying true to yourself. Turns out it's one of the hardest things for people to do. We get contrary input all the time - from peers, parents/authority figures, family, media, accepted "truths," things we've been taught. I'm going to give you some examples but first I'm going to tell you one of the best ways to reinforce your ability to stand firm - carefully select who you surround yourself with. In my years of multilevel marketing (MLM) I heard it often - surround yourself with successful people if you want to be successful. In the spiritual community, we learn the importance of surrounding ourselves with like minded individuals. I bristled at the concept when I was in MLM because I'm not exclusionary. Also, I didn't especially like most of the "successful" people available to me! Now I realize that my definition of success has nothing to do with money, so of course I wasn't successful in strict money-making professions no matter how much we were told that recruiting & team-building helped people. Also, no wonder I didn't find affinity with or particularly like those people. Even most of the best were calculating, there was always an agenda. I don't have an agenda in the spiritual realm nor have I had one in business. It was always, is still, about helping people & having that naturally lead to payment. I was never successful because I don't have an agenda & never truly believed that was the best way to help people. I'm realizing all this as I speak it. The one time I was successful in recruiting was when I was in Tupperware in the mid 1980s. My message was, "I'm having the time of my life & I'm making money while doing it. I can teach you how to do that too if you want." Because it was entirely true & my emphasis really was on the fun I had, I attracted people in droves. It was one of the happiest & most successful times in my life. I was out being myself, having a great time in my chosen profession, attracting friends & money, business & success. I loved the product & the delivery system (home parties). I practiced what I preached (home was full of Tupperware). I did business with entire honesty. If someone wanted to buy something that wouldn't fit her needs, I'd tell her, often down-sell her to provide what would work best. And of course that always led to increased sales, from her, her friends, etc. Because total honesty in business always attracts more business, especially when that's not your goal.
It might seem like I've gotten away from my topic but I haven't. "Standing in your truth" is about much more than your religious or spiritual beliefs - it's about all your beliefs, all you "stand for." But let's take that first. For all that I'm a very open person, I'm also very guarded. I don't state most of my beliefs to most people. One, they aren't open for debate. Two, they're private. Three, I guard against people & sources that try to persuade me to their views. I don't listen to preachers via media, for one thing. I don't care for the method of delivery, am too sensitive to the tone of persuasion, the statements of "fact." I'm no longer open to anyone interpreting the Bible for me or telling me what to think & believe. I've "been there, done that" very heavily in the past. I learned conflicting things, heard things that entirely went against what I now know in my heart. It led me away from God & religion, & it took me many years to cast that off & move on to spirituality. I have a dear friend who regularly listens to a certain preacher who wants me to start listening too, & I told her I'd check it out. I haven't done so & the hardest thing will be explaining that I won't after all, & why I won't. But I have to be true to myself & my needs. What works for her won't work for me. It meets her needs but goes entirely against mine. That's standing in my truth. I am not anti-church or anti-Bible. I've read the Bible from cover to cover enough to be fairly conversant, have studied it. When I read the Bible now, I read it with Jesus, my beloved Brother. So there's no way I want to listen to a human talk about it!
I said I don't share my views/truths with everyone. That's not just true of spirituality, but of all things. I also don't hold back when it's time to speak. I gauge what I say, tailor it to my audience, but that's what all teachers do. Teachers have the gift of language interpretation, basically. We put things in terms the listener can understand, to effectively convey the message so it's received. I use that here, & when I talk with people on any topic, any level. I share my truths but don't try to persuade. I also try not to try to justify. That's one I've struggled with, since I was a people-pleaser. You can't be a people-pleaser & stand in your truth. So I used to try to over-explain & justify my stand, my point of view. I haven't entirely moved away from that but I've come a long way. I did a little of it in the paragraph before this, telling you how much I've studied the Bible in the past, how listening to preaching & lots of religious media hurt me in the past. I still have some of the people-pleaser in me - most of us do. We want to be liked, accepted, have approval. That's where surrounding yourself with supportive people really matters.
When there are people who don't believe as I do, mostly I say very little about the subject. I let them talk, state my position if I need to, agree to disagree. I don't try to persuade, don't open myself for criticism or persuasion. I used to be too open, too eager to please & listen or persuade, & set myself up for unwanted input. I no longer try to share all I know or believe with everyone I'm associated with, family & friends. I share all with some of them because of their supportive attitude. I have a new BFF that I talk with daily & we share everything, basically serve as "significant other" for each other. She's on a very similar path & we learn from each other. Although we don't talk as often, I also end up telling my daughter everything of significance to me. The rest get edited versions, & that's perfectly ok. Not even your closest friends or family necessarily want to hear about certain things. I used to tell my old BFF everything & now we very seldom talk. We're still BFFs of the heart but she's in a very different place than I am. She never reads this blog & my new BFF always does, even though she already knows what I'm going to say. Now I know that our jobs are to guide those who are seeking the path we're on or the information we have, not to persuade. We aren't supposed to try to convert the world. We're to support those who are like minded, & help those who come to us. I've been told to speak my truths via this blog, & God will lead the ones to it that He chooses. He gives me the topics. Part 2 tomorrow.
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